Spent last night trying to register for WCC online. To get deluxe housing (since we want to room privately together as a married couple) it cost us a total of over $400!! YIKES!! If WCC wasn't worth it, I'd have boycotted it. Last time I was at WCC, the prices were half what it is now. What happened.. did the Redwood Christian Park have a complete makeover to make it so expensive? Or did it take more to pay for the conference speakers/workshop leaders?! Aiya. I'll still be going, but we're wincing from the price. We can do alot with $400. Like pay for a third of our property tax. But alas, we're putting it to eternal use instead.
Have been thinking about my brother and FSIL. Before they got engaged, I was really worried about their relationship... it always seems really volatile, too much fuel for the fire, and really unhealthy communication patterns. I was mostly scared of FSIL, and her safety. I can see alot of my old self in her, and if I hadn't changed into the person I am today, I would have been similarly stuck in a relationship to a man resembling my father. Her growth, sense of self, and self-worth would be stunted and crushed for many many years to come. And now that they're engaged, I'm even more scared for them. Engagement and the process of planning a wedding is even more stressful than a regular relationship... and if a regular dating relationship was riddled with very serious problems, what would engagement look like?! Much less living together and marriage?! She jokes around about him needing professional counseling, which wouldn't be bad... but she needs it just as badly herself. Being an enabler is NOT a light matter.
But now that they've announced their engagement, I'll take a backseat and trust that God will take care of them. I've taken a conscious decision to love them both, support them, and be happy for them, and be there should they need anything (its only a matter of time for another family-induced ulcer to build). But even so, I relapse and I am so worried for them. It's like waiting for an accident to happen, unless both are extremely serious about working out their problems (I'm talking about both of them) and actually follow through with it. One thing I know for sure, it won't be an easy path. Given the nature of my parents, that is. (And THAT'S an entirely different story...)
Posted by Ruth at 1/03/2003
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